Dear 6-inch Jointer

What can I say? You had to see this coming, didn’t you? We just haven’t been spending much time together. I’m not even sure we have all that much in common anymore. I mean, yeah, I came to visit you last night, and I swept off all the dust and cobwebs, and you felt all pretty and new, and for a minute there, I remembered how good we were together.

But you don’t even acknowledge my friends. You know, all of those wide boards I brought home? It’s just so awkward when we’re all together.

Honestly, it’s not you; it’s me. I mean, I’m a different person now. You knew I’d been spending time with that jack plane, right? The one with the cambered iron? Well, I think we really could make a go of it. We want the same things. I just think maybe the plane and I are healthier together.

And really, I want you to be happy. You’re a good jointer. I know there’s someone out there in the world who will love just as much as you deserve.

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